In this corner, weighing in at ten pounds two ounces, The Orange Menace!

Known for his extra toes and shortage of wits, this fighter is capable of squishing opponents noses with one smack of his enormous paw. He’s also capable of sustaining injury and fighting on. Many times has he chased a neighbourhood cat out of the yard, only to return a few minutes later, limping and dripping blood. Don’t mess with The Orange Menace!

In this corner, weighing in at an undisclosed amount (because it’s not polite to talk about a lady’s weight), Miss Sophie!

But friends, don’t let her sweet demeanor fool you. Her coach (okay, Victor) refers to her as Bloody Paw,due to the time she was sleeping in his lap and for no apparent reason jumped straight into the air after having dug her claws into his hands for leverage, leaving him with a bloody stump.

ARE YOU READY TO WRASSLE?????

Be ready to meet your match, Orange Menace!

Let me at ‘er! Let me at ‘er! (behind him is Orange Menace’s late, great manager and pal, Mr Fatboy…don’t forget the mister when you’re talking about the Fatboy, or else!)

Bring it on, cheese boy! Show mama what you got!

And the match is on! He’s in with his right hook, she’s got a bite on his tail, but wait, he’s going for the old head licking trick! Yes, folks, he pinned her down and instead of taking a bite out of one ear, he’s giving her a bath…gotta get that spot of dirt between her ears! And then they’re off and running, up and down the hallway, sliding on the area rug like it’s a surfboard. Oh, no, they’re back on the couch and he’s pushed her off. He’s sitting calmly watching her and…and she lunges! Jumping straight into the air, her arms around his neck and this ain’t no bath she’s giving him, but a good old bite to the head! He’s losing his balance, he’s off the couch and the race is on again! But wait, they’re back, leaping onto the cushions for the last round. It’s not looking so good for Miss Soph- er – Bloody Paw, but maybe I’m wrong, because judging from the picture below, it’s very possible that the Orange Menace is about to concentrate so hard that his eyeballs are going to pop out!

Whew! Folks in the nick of time, just before anyone got really hurt, time was called.

Not by the ref’s bell, but the dinner bell!

All’s well, that ends well!